Related texts: Romans 5:6-11; John 19:1-5, 25-30; Luke 23:33-46; Mark 15:15-39; Matthew 27:25-54; 1 Peter 2:24; 2 Corinthians 5:21; Hebrews 4:14-16; Genesis 3:15; Isaiah 53
Every year during Good Friday I spend time reflecting on the sacrifice of Christ on the cross. This obviously isn’t anything super original as that’s been the practice of Christians on Good Friday for most of the last 2000 years. However, I didn’t grow up in a church that put much emphasis on Good Friday. I don’t recall any Good Friday services or really any emphasis on the sacrifice on the cross outside of Easter Sunday (where it was just part of the resurrection story). But as an adult my understanding of the atonement not only has grown, but my appreciation for it apart from the resurrection- though not independent of it- has also grown. In fact, it’s become the holiday I think about most often. I regularly consider the cross at Calvary and how that moment in history changed history! Obviously without the resurrection the death on the cross is hard to evidentially prove that it accomplished what God intended its purposes for, but knowing that Jesus was resurrected on the third day means that the sacrifice itself really, truly “finished the job” all in its own right. It’s from this mindset that the song “Criminal” was written.
The first question that struck me was “did Jesus know He was doing all of that for me?” There’s the obvious theological foundations that Christ was primarily and supremely going to Golgotha for His own glory and to honor the Father and satisfy His wrath. This is a crucial understanding and I don’t mean to gloss over it. It’s with that reality in mind, however, that the question was asked. Was He single-minded on doing the Father’s work? Or was He also allowing His thoughts to wander to the millions, even billions of people whose sin He was atoning for? It’s not unreasonable to think that the God of the universe, who has predestined those according to His will, might be able to consider (to nobody in particular) “I’m doing this for John, I’m doing this for Mary, I’m doing this for Kevin, I’m doing this for Lauren”. This was actually the first line birthed in the song:
When you walked down that road carryin’ that tree
Was I on your mind?
When you walked up that hill staring fate in the eyes
Was I on your mind?
I don’t always write songs sequentially through the song (first verse, chorus, second verse, bridge, tag) but this time the song really was written as it played. The narratives of the suffering of Christ and His crucifixion in the Gospels were playing in my mind, but the verse that jumped into my mind was from Romans:
“But God demonstrates His own love toward us, in that while we were still sinners, Christ died for us.” -Romans 5:8 (NASB)
My heart welled up with all sorts of emotions as the next line of the song was crafted out of that verse in Romans:
Though I reap the benefits after
It was me with the nails and the hammer
I wept after writing that line. Sometimes I’ll play this song in my living room just in a moment of reflection and I’ll still get choked up at this prechorus. It was my sin that required Jesus to go to the cross. It was my sin that needed to be paid for. It was my sin that Christ bore in His own perfection, so much so that He actually became sin on the cross and was utterly destroyed. (2 Corinthians 5:21) It was only natural to focus on exactly what happened on that hill of Calvary. The chorus of the song is wordy, but it’s a simple theme.
At Calvary my debt was paid, a cost I could never cover on my best day
Calvary on a criminal’s cross an innocent man on a tree
Died for a criminal like me
The thought of my Lord dying on a cross designed for a Roman criminal, suffering and humiliated, strikes me with grief and mourning. But what really pushes me to the point of tears is the thought that I am the criminal. It’s not simply that Christ died on some Roman cross far away and removed from me, it’s the cross that I’ve earned through my sin. Jesus didn’t just die on any old cross- He died on my cross. My sin makes me an enemy of God and yet God Himself wanted to reconcile me to Himself while I was still in opposition to Him so that I might become His. (Romans 5:6-11)
The second verse of the song was an image that struck me after writing the chorus. It was the picture that I saw when I wrote the prechorus:
When you laid on that pole and felt the metal
Was I on your mind?
And when the nail pierced your skin, drove into the wood
Was I on your mind?
If you’ve heard the song, you know that that last “was I on Your mind” is full of emotion. It’s like I needed to know: did You see me in the face of that centurion as he hammered that metal nail through your hand? Did you look directly into his eyes and think “I still forgive you, Kevin”?
As I’m writing this, I’m overwhelmed by the grace of my Lord.
The bridge was somewhat challenging to write, as I wrote way more lines than what actually showed up in the song. There are so many snapshots of what Jesus went through. Once again, these are all found in the Gospels, mostly explicitly, with only two implicit statements (notated in bold):
When you hung there upright, when you struggled to breathe
When you looked in your mother’s eyes, when you asked for a drink
When you heard them mock, when your back felt weak
When you cried out to God, when you forgave me
When you gave up your spirit, when you breathed your last
When you finished the job, when the sky turned black
When the veil ripped apart, when the Father cried
When the whole earth wept, ‘cause the Son of God died
The first bold line “when You struggled to breathe” is implicit in the text but demonstrably true due to the torturous experience of hanging on a cross. If you’ve never researched the type of physical torment that goes into being crucified, it’s horrific. In short, it’s a long and excruciating experience of suffocation. This article from Forbes is a great summary, if you can stomach it. Even in its brevity it’s a shocking read.
The second line in bold is an observation that the Father forsook Christ on the cross, by Jesus’s own words (Matt. 27:46), but maybe with a little less presumption than in Stuart Townend’s “How Deep The Father’s Love For Us” which uses the line “the Father turned His face away”. I’m not sure if it’s true that the Father turned away from the Son, but He certainly forsook Him and I imagine that in God’s infinite love for Himself and yet His perfect justice to be “pleased to crush [Jesus]” (Isaiah 53:10) that the image of a weeping father makes sense to me. This is certainly artistic liberty, but I didn’t feel that it was unfounded.
The end of the song felt like it needed a small glimmer of the hope of Easter. After all, like I said earlier, without Easter it would be hard to have confidence in the crucifixion. As a simple tag I continued the thought at the end of the chorus:
Died for a criminal
Paid for a criminal
Rose again for a criminal like me
The small nod to substitutionary atonement lit by the hope found in the resurrection felt like the right perspective to take. Considering how many times I wrote the word “me” in this song I also knew I needed to keep the hero of the story in mind. I am the criminal, and the hero died for the benefit of the criminal. What an incredible gift we have in Christ’s sacrifice on the cross!
This song is titled “Criminal” but it’s 100% not about the criminal. It’s about the one falsely accused. It’s about the one treated with contempt. It’s about the one who paid the penalty for the crime He did not commit. This song is about the lamb who was slain. His name is Jesus, the only truly innocent person in history.
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Kevin McClure has been leading worship in the local church for over 10 years in different capacities of multi-generational, young adult, and student ministries. As a songwriter, musical artist, and worship leader he has had the honor of touring the United States both as a performer and worship leader over the better part of the last decade. With a heart to see believers learn how to take the act of worship beyond the setting of a group gathering, Kevin is incredibly intentional with his time on and offstage to help teach the practice of worship as a lifestyle through conversation and writing- including through his blog. He also leads the Worship Leader Network by organizing regular events and building relationships with other worship people throughout the Midwest. Kevin lives in Omaha, Nebraska with his bride Hailey his two daughters, Everleigh and Eliska, and his son Bear. His favorite food is coffee, loves bonfires, and is an avid Chicago Cubs fan. You can find more of Kevin’s writings and creative endeavors at KevinMcClure.org and follow him on social media platforms through his handle, @KevinTMcClure.
Kevin McClure 